In Memoriam: The Television News Media (1950-2005)

I thought this was a great rant. My friend Nancy wrote it on her webzine and I thought it was apporperate. So Thanks again Nancy for the rant. I am glad to see we aren't the only ones.


After a lengthy illness, the Television News Media (TNM) finally succumbed to a combination of lapses in professionalism and ethics, complicated by an obvious loss of the will to live.
Born in the early Fifties, the TNM grew from its infancy and developed as a strong, easily accessible news source for a constantly growing number of viewers, supported by the talents of informed investigative journalists.
During its frequently-troubled adolescent years, TNM found its voice and was often outspoken on the issues of the day, both domestic and international. Not afraid to criticize the government and its policies, TNM regularly investigated its own stories, and often took the initiative to look behind White House press releases and other suspect sources.
The TNM ventured, unafraid and uncensored, into coverage of events like Watergate, and was widely credited with turning the tide of public opinion against American involvement in Viet Nam by bringing the true horrors of war, as well as the lies being told about it, to the American public.
Upon hearing of TNM's untimely passing, childhood friends reminisced about their departed friend, who had earned the nickname "VP" (Vigilant Press) back in the halcyon days of early broadcasting.
"We started noticing the symptoms on Inauguration Day, January 2001," explained a long-time friend. "There were thousands of protesters lining the streets along Bush's route, but TNM was adamant in its refusal to show them. We should have realized then that something was terribly wrong. It seemed so out of keeping with the TNM we'd grown up with."
In the lead-up to the war in Iraq, it was obvious that TNM was in failing health. Stories generated by the White House about WMD, a connection to 9/11 and Al Qaeda affiliations aired without any questions being asked.
"Back in the day," observed a long-time TNM colleague, "a story as bogus as that would never have gotten past the cue-card writers – it was that full of holes."
By the time the 2004 presidential campaign was in full swing, TNM was out of control. Rumours about wild Swift Boat parties began circulating, and viewers were left to their own ingenuity to try to ferret out any real information.
"It seemed unable to focus," commented one angry viewer. "The whole time questions were being asked about Bush's military record, TNM was arguing about the legitimacy of everyone's sources. Fair enough. But it got so caught up in the minutia of who was saying what, the real story about Bush's whereabouts during his so-called military service was completely lost."
In the aftermath of the election, TNM began showing signs of forgetfulness. Although two months of investigation into vote fraud, in Ohio and elsewhere, were ongoing, TNM failed to even mention it.
"There was a time when a story like that would have been all over the airwaves," said a disgruntled former colleague. "But all TNM seemed to be interested in was Scott Peterson, and Brad and Jen breakin' up – whoever they are."
"I think TNM kind of rallied when the Valerie Plame and Abu Ghraib scandals surfaced," commented a more compassionate viewer. "You know, all that talk about getting to the bottom of things, and demanding answers – it was great while it lasted. For a minute there, it was almost like the old days. But there was never any follow-through, and – well, you know the rest."
By the spring of 2005, TNM had deteriorated to the point where it had to be hooked up to a TelePrompTer, apparently fed directly by the Administration, the right-wing, and corporate interests. Polls showed that a vast majority of viewers favoured pulling the plug.
Dementia had set in, and TNM started babbling incoherently about runaway brides and other nonsense, obviously unable to speak rationally about the economy, job outsourcing, soaring gas prices and the disastrous situation in Iraq.
"I think it was failure to cover the Downing Street Memo story that did it in," said a (former) devoted viewer. "It was like ol' TNM just didn’t have any fight left in him. That’s when we knew it was over," he added, too overcome by emotion to continue.
The White House has yet to issue any formal statement on TNM's passing, but spokesperson Scotty McClelland called the idea of the death of ethical journalism "absurd."
"You just have to look at the up-and-comers like Jeff Gannon to realize that honesty and integrity are flourishing in today's creative news-gathering environment."
While official autopsy findings have not been disclosed, it is widely acknowledged that TNM's illness was contagious, having already spread to the radio and print news media.
The deceased is survived by websites and blogs, who reluctantly took control of the family business when TNM proved too weak-minded to carry out its duties responsibly.
Memorial services will not be held, due to what is obviously a total lack of interest on anyone's part.
In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to appropriate websites.

ok its been a while since my last post.

Well I arrived back from Mobile on Sunday and well I have forgot to write about the wedding. The trip was a fun but it also very long. I was happy to see my friends but I am kind of glad that I don't have to see them all the time.

It was a pretty wedding and the reception was alright.I didn't meet many new people and well I dressed like a writer. Speaking of writer's I saw Tom Wolfe on TV. He is a great writer and they were talking about The Right Stuff. Which I think is a great book about NASA the history of the early space program. That made me think I still want to go up in space. The weather is great,unfortnatly its still to Hot to go outside. I like that I have a great day ahead of me. I spend most of my day either writing or feeling bored. My muscles are killing me and though I have to take my meds and shower. Well, I have recently finished reading Fever Pitch, it was a good book and the story was well through out. Nick Hornsby is a great writer. I don't know why but I do like his books. My favorite is High Fidelity and About A Boy.
High Fidelity was a great book, Its also a real funny book if you like music and neurotic people and relationships.

Well, I am a bit tired but I am not sleepy. I have a terrible stomach ache. I wonder what to do. The dog is on the couch.
I think I'll write more later but for now I am taking a shower.

Going to review a few things and then head out.

Well about my trip to Mobile, the trip as I said before was long trip but it was fun. While on the road we drove through Mississippi and stopped at St.Pauls. Boy the place sure as heck changed since I graduated. The main school building and the whole campus looked like a Botanical garden. The weather was nice, and we took a trip around campus and visited Covington, where we ate at Cafe Etoile. I liked the place when I was a student, and I thought I would run into David. David,Ms Amanda's exboyfriend. I thought he would be happy to see me and plus I wanted to just say hi. The waitress didn't remember me,but I could of sworn it was Kristin Dugger. Craig's fiancee or wife. Anyway, driving through Covington, it lost some of its appeal of small town America by turning it into one of those crappy suburbia type cities. It was a great town and the downtown still cute but once you get of Highway 180 it looks like a big version of Sugarland. Targets and Wallmart. It was terrible.

I wanted to live back in Covington but it would be most likely me living on Janckee or Boston Avenue. Anyway, Covington sure as hell changed a lot in 6 years.
But aside from Covington,we drove through Mississippi or as I call it, The Billboard State. The whole state was covered with buildboards advertising acts who are performing at the casinos. I mean it looked like has beens who couldn't be on the Hollywood Squares. I did do something subconciously while driving, I went to the bathroom and everytime. I guess its my way of "shitting "on Trent Lott's state. The state is a lovely state but too many billboards. I like the state but I hate Trent Lott. Pasacugla is a small town, but its close to Alabama, I began to think it was part of the state.

Alabama is a nice state, but when we got to Mobile, we went to the hotel, the hotel was nice but i felt like staying in bed for a while my muscles were aching. I never had a terrible cramps in my legs, I had a swelling the calf. After, our first night, we left for the wedding. Spring Hill is a lovely campus, infact Rice and Spring Hill are the best two campuses I've been to. I mean I wouldn't want to live there for 4 years but the chapel was amazing. So I thought Spring Hill was a great campus to just walk around, too bad it was to damn hot.

I figured the campus has the University of Toronto feel to it,but with the heat of the South.

After the wedding, we came back to the hotel and ate dinner at this barbeque place that Robb Walsh was saying was one of the best barbeque in the South and dad heard from one of his co-workers it was good. but in my own opinion, the barbeque was kind of dry and it wasn't all that great. I liked the potato salad, but the food was alright, they had a thing called the Beef plate, which I was disappointed thinking it was going to have just beef stuff but instead it was just brisket. Saucy's is alright and the only problem is that the waitstaff can't count. I mean the food tasted alright, but I wouldn't brag saying its the best. I have had barbeque from Memphis and I have had Texas barbeque and I still think Memphis is the best. My next trip for good barbeque is going to be Kansas City. I have had "southern" which is different then Texas barbeque. Memphis barbeque, slow cooks the ribs and add flavouring in the sauce. Southern barbeque the sauce is added last minute and its home-made, Texas doesn't put barbeque sauce on there dinner. Its all in the rub.

I do like barbeque and I do like different types but I have to go with my traditional traditions of having it. First, if your in the south like Alabama, you drink Ice Tea,sweetened. If your in Memphis you drink unflavored Ice Tea but in Texas it has to be with beer, a good Texas beer like Shiner or Lone Star.

So its all a variety of ways, in Kansas City, I'll find what is the proper drink with there barbeque.

Well,I guess to be honest, the review of Saucy is food was alright and the service was well an experience. But if you are in Mobile, its a good place to listen to old blues classics and have the southern experience. The potato salad was good, the rib I had was fair and the price were great.
So i will say its a **** out of *****.

Here is a link for Saucy Q Barbeque in Mobile and read about it. If your interested in going.

http://www.saucyqbarbque.com/index.htm

I will hopefully soon have pictures of the wedding posted. I didn't bring my camera but I did bring my laptop so I could write. Which I did most of the time. Well anyway, I will have a few pictures I am going to scan as soon as I am done.