A LONG TIME SINCE I LAST POSTED

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Hello you people.

Well I know first off I am sorry for not written in nearly a month or so but a lot of things have been happening and well I haven`t had the time to write. Plus I haven`t had the internet either so I have been deprived from writing. Well a lot of things have happend since I last wrote. Wefll for starters I am back in Canada after a few weeks of being stuck in the heat of Houston. A few things have happend, I have been so busy that I totally lost track of time and everything else. I have been staying at both my uncle`s and in the countryside of Quebec. The country is a total pleasure and the weather though has been hot.

I have also become more focus on my faith in Buddhism. So I am totally stuck in the paradime of being secluded from the world and being without the internet.
A few things that are going well and I have been extremely busy thinking of ways to explain I am sorry for not written in ages. While I am here in Canada, I am meeting Marie-Claire Blais, to discuss my book and whether or not it will be published. I am pretty excited but also nervous. Well I am doing ok mentally and have developed more of a spiritualistic attitude after reading Kerouac`s book The Dharma Bums.

The book I read for a few days opened my eyes to the world around me and I have slowly become aware of my surroundings. The book has also helped me understand more of my Buddhist faith. So I can say that I enjoyed the book. I also finished reading a book about Albert Camus and Jean-Paul Satre, the book though was a bit bias on Satre`s part it also was a good discussion to have with both my parents.

I also began reading a book about TM (TRANSISTANTIONAL MEDITATION) which was good but I already learned most of the tricks to TM and I didn`t really need another explinational book. I thought the book would help spiritualy but it was pretty boring. I thought if I learned TM and SCI (Science of Creative Intelligence) I could practice what I learned and teach others, but it was so boring I decided to change my mind.

But anyway, back to my Buddhism, I have a mini Buddha that I got in Chinatown Montréal and I love it. It helps me conscientrate on myself and my spiritual conscious. I can`t wait to tell my mom that I have become more aware of the Spiritualistic of life and that I am not as stressed as I was do to meditation and solidarity in the countryside. Being a Buddhist Catholic does make more sense now then it did before.

Well, I am hoping I still remain this positive when I return back to Houston. My birthday is coming up and I can`t wait. I still don`t know what I am going to do. It is going to be a big one this year 25. I am no longer a baby and yet now I am totally defined as an adult. So that is keeping me from getting angry. I am excited about my up coming birthday and yet I am also wondering what I am going to do.

I am also coming back to Montréal on Friday and stay with my grandmother which will be fun. I am planning on returning back to Chinatown and find some other things to embrace the Eastern Culture. Boy am I excited. Since doing meditation, my body has less pains then before and with the heat I am still skeptical of going outside.

I hope to enjoy my time sitting and thinking. I am going to try to practice the mantra on the flight back.

Well, anyway, I am going to shower now and hopefully I`ll feel cleaner and then I`ll walk to Chinatown and see how much insense sticks are. So I can get them next week.

Once again I am sorry for not written in a while but that will explained all.

What a day!

Boy I can't believe its only 3:55 and I feel like I haven't accomplished one goal in my things I wanted to do today. I know I should just relax but its kind of freaky that I haven't done much lately. Things are pretty well done for today. I am a bit sleepy but I am not tired so I don't want to nap. The weather outside is again hot so that sucks. Mom and Dad left to go to the store and I didn't really want to go. So of course I chose to stay home and well think. To think I have nothing really important matters to think about just have to fix things around the house and clean the bathroom again. Sure small stuff like that but heck I can do it later.

This is a really boring Saturday. I can't get a hold of anybody. I feel like I am going to spend again more time with my family then need be. Which can be both a positive by that I can enjoy a free home cooked meal and spending it talking with my family about stuff. But a negative side, I am stuck at home again on a Saturday. Damn I hate being bored.

Well, my batteries are running low on my lap top so its always kind of dark typing. Last night I spent it at home, which was fun and relaxing but some days I just feel like I should go out on my own and have fun without worrying so much. I am going to talk it over with my parents to see if I can go out tonight on my own after dinner. I know my mom will say they'll take me, but I want to be able to think clearly and be on my own just once.

Well I am heading to Montreal in a few days and I can't wait. I am going to relax and enjoy the time I am there. I am tired of Houston and its becoming boring. I wonder what I am going to do there. I think I am going to read and write. Hmm! I hate that I feel so weak in the heat. I wish I knew where the hell Bjorn was so I can take him to Sliders. I may try to convince my parents to take me to Brian Oneils or Gingerman. Just I need time to think on my own.

A lot is on my mind and I want to relax and try to take things easy. Slowly. Hmm! I guess I should be happy that I am at home now but what am I going to do for the rest of my life. It sucks. I hate being stuck at home always on a Saturday night. I should go out and meet people. I wish I could drive, oh well.

Enough of me ranting. I am going to take it easy for now and see if the darkness of my computer is caused by a low battery if so I am going to turn off my computer and start again later on. Since I know that I'll be stuck at home again tonight.

addium in the last few minutes I found out what caused the sudden low dimlight apparently i placed it on low last night without me knowing I did so that clears things up now I can type.

This is has been a truly boring day

The weather was hot and humid and I couldn't do much because it was to painful to even go outside. The weather got to the point I nearly passed out heading to Big Lots today. My head hurts and I am tired. I didn't do much because of the weather. I did spend most of the day at home cleaning and relaxing something I should of done a while back but I couldn't do it because my brain was so full of stuff.

I had a terrible feeling of being sick and was supposed to go out tonight but I felt like throwing up after I got home from dinner. I am tired and my muscles are aching me. Boy am I tired I am trying to sleep but my eyes are still awake. The weather isn't helping me.

Oh ya today is Canada day so I thought I decorate the setting with a nifty picture of the Red Maple Leaves. Happy Canada you hosers. Also in sad note Amy and I broke up yesterday night we are still friends but the break up kind of made my day weirder. Hope that this brightens those who miss pretty foilage.
So I thought I write a lot today but I just didn' feel like writing much cause I am so tired.